BadFun

What a novel and completely frightening concept. Most fear falling in love but once it happens, we embrace it and sometimes without even knowing it.

We fight tooth and nail not to be part of the “love crowd”. We, as a whole, actually fear falling in love more then we do abandonment or even falling! How can an emotion have such a hold over us where we will try to avoid it at any cost? And by the same token, once we have succumbed to “love” how did we live without it in the first place?

All too often I have heard that dreaded phrase, “I’ve never been in love before”. After hearing such I am completely confused. How did one manage to never be in love before – not even once? It is one of those feeling that I suggest everyone experience because with the bad also comes the good. Once I have rid myself of the stupid look on my face; you know the one with the mouth wide open and the eyes bigger than a silver dollar, I ask “why not and how did you manage that”? And every time I have received virtually the same answer – “I just never wanted to be hurt like that”.

Hmm, ok I get it but WRONG IDEA! You want to experience that euphoric feeling. You want to feel as if you’re free falling because as frightening as it is, it is truly an awesome feeling. Don’t guard your heart so much that you never get to feel such a grand emotion. Remember the first time you ever rode a roller coaster? That is what I compare falling in love to….only a far more controlled type of free falling (although I cannot guarantee that you won’t feel a little bit nauseas).

We all want to guard our hearts and never experience hurt or anger but there is always a flip side. By going through such an experience, we are able to develop and grow. Now I am not saying that this is the only way to become who you are and know what it is that you want. However, being in love – feeling that emotion – going through the ups and downs and everything in between is one of the most challenging experiences you will go through in your life.

Don’t force love to happen – when it happens you will know and when it does happen, don’t run from it like a spreading plague. There are no rules, the boundaries can be set, sometimes logic flies out the window but all in all it is a great feeling and one I suggest everyone experience at least once in your life.

The sky certainly seemed limitless. I remember laying in the grass out in our courtyard during lunch when I was in high school and just looking up at the clouds and letting my mind wander.

Granted, we felt uncertainty and inhibition back then but nothing like today. As we become older we seem to restrain ourselves more and more. We can’t do this because of that. We can’t do that because someone may get angry. The list of what we can and cannot do doesn’t seem to balance out any longer.

I was staring out my sliding glass window, looking at the trees and how a few leaves have already changed color and I just thought to myself, what if I just threw caution to the wind and let go a bit. Then I began to realize all the things I have said I wanted to do again, but never find the time to do them because there is always an excuse on why my time is taken.

I know I’m not alone in this. So, here is what I am suggestion. If you have kids, put your parents, in laws or babysitter to work and have them watch your kids. If you don’t have kids (I have pets), then get the hell out of the house for a weekend and try:

• Having a picnic
• Going for a bike ride
• Take a long walk around your neighborhood or in a park
• Get a make over
• Take a weekend skiing trip
• Go for a horse ride on the beach
• Ride in a hot air balloon
• Hit an ice skating rink
• Take a ride on a rollercoaster
• Go free diving


Do something and make it unique. Go out and have fun alone, with friends, with your partner but make sure whatever it is you choose to do, it is something where you can just let go of your inhibitions. Lose the uncertainty for a little while and just feel free again – like we did when we were younger.

The Matador is perfect for guys who want stimulation while masturbating alone. However, this toy is also great for couples.

Sometimes I just really love my job because I get to test products out like this. The Matador comes with one stretchy ring that fits snuggly around the base of the penis and expands as the penis expands. In addition to that stretchy ring, this product comes with a vibrating bullet that you insert through the hole at the top of the toy.

Now I am not taking anything away from the fun you guys should have. The more the better and the better, the happier you will be. Yet, I’m gonna go there and add why females will love this as well! My favorite part of this toy is the tiny Matador horns that are positioned perfectly for clitoral stimulation. Factor in the multi – speed vibe and it’s orgasm heaven for the both of you.

The Matador is reasonably priced and will give you tons of pleasure. This toy is definitely in my top ten of favorite adult toys.

I have no idea why I was thinking about this yesterday – it could have been because of the discussion I had the night before. On my drive into work yesterday morning it hit me; it has been a long time since I have been “wooed”.

Wooing can mean different things to different people but to me it has multiple meanings. For example, when I started dating my last boyfriend he actually had a romantic side (for about a second). He took me out to dinner which was nice but what really got me was the trek we made to the beach after. Granted it was getting cold out and, being on the beach in a thin jacket and short skirt is not something I would ever recommend, the fact that he thought all this up was amazing. The simplicity of just walking on the beach came across as such a grand gesture that I still remember it to this day. Just the other day I was speaking to my last boyfriend and asked him what happened to his romantic side – what happen to the guy that “wooed” me? I won’t dare repeat what his answer was. Lets just say if I could have beaten him with the phone in my hand, at that moment, I would have without giving a second thought to all the mess.

Now let me go back a ways to the boyfriend before Joe Idiot I just spoke about. He was really one of the sweetest guys I have ever met. He was the type of guy that would drive two hours on a Friday from work just to spend the weekend with me. Every single time he came for the weekend he would always come bearing gifts and those gifts were candles. There was a candle shop by his house that he would stop at every Thursday; he made sure to pick up the scents he knew I liked and every Friday I would receive new candles. Of course I had to tell him to stop because even now, I have enough candles to light up my entire house! In addition to the gifts and nice restaurants, he actually took the time out to try and make dinner. That “wooed” me because he put forth the effort to do something he wouldn’t normally do. Thinking about it, he did a lot of “wooing” that I probably took for granted.

And now here we are, back to the present, and I sit and think about that conversation I had two nights ago. When did men lose their ambition to pursue and woo a woman? I’m not the froo froo type – although doing it up every once in a while is nice – which means I don’t expect the expensive dinners or the lavish jewelry (although nice) but I do expect someone to stand out and make an impact. I can have sex talk with anyone and, well, I do actually. It’s my JOB! I can banter with the best of them and I have. However, if you are trying to make an effort to start something new, with me, you need to woo me and not just in the beginning but throughout the entire relationship because if you don’t “woo”, shock and awe me, I will get bored, and the relationship will become routine.

If I end up getting more enjoyment out of brushing my teeth or getting my car washed, then need I say more? Anyway, I think “wooing” is a woman thing and women love it. Not all the time, maybe not most of the time but sometimes it is nice to just be swept off your feet if even for a second.

We are part of a social system that, for the most part, doesn’t really like change. Take for instance, our government. To date, we still refuse to elect either a woman or person of color into our highest, most sought after, and most revered position in the American government – and for those who are scratching their heads I am talking about the office of the President of the United States.

Therefore, when change does occur, either abruptly or gradually, for the most part we don’t understand the change which means we won’t accept it. That which we do not understand, we are frightened by. So, a change in someone close is hard to swallow and we often demean it by viciously yelling, “You’ve changed and I don’t like it”.

I have experienced this recently. A year full of drama (and drama I never want to go through again) left a substantial impact on my life. I realized that I had to change for me and my change wasn’t bad now that I have been able to smooth out the rough edges. And oh boy did I hear often that the change wasn’t me and that so and so didn’t like it. What those screaming didn’t understand is that the change wasn’t to hurt them – it wasn’t even about them, but it was something I had to do.

I became a softer, kinder, more patient and slightly more tolerant person. How that can be construed as bad when I was nothing more then a pessimistic witch on a 600hp broom is something I still don’t understand. However, in taking a step back I realized I wasn’t really being attacked for my change but rather the other person(s) weren’t sure how to accept it because I had been one way for such a long time. The puzzle pieces no longer fit and they were frightened. By attacking, there was hope of reverting back to who I was which, for all purposes, was familiar territory. I get that. Now, this isn’t to say that I am still not that witch on a broom from time to time – I’m still tough (possibly even tougher than before because of the various experiences which occurred), I still stand my ground (and sometimes I’m still wrong regardless of me thinking I’m right), I am definitely more cautious then I was before, my eyes are opened wider than ever before BUT….. I am more caring then before and since things are turning around, I am more goal-oriented then I ever was before (including my college years).

To better help others adjust to your change make sure you pay attention to what they are saying. Understanding that they are frightened because they may lose you will go along way in helping you explain that you want them in your life and a part of your change. Sit and listen openly to what the other party has to say.

Once you have heard the other person’s reasoning’s on why they don’t “agree” with your change, sit back and evaluate what has caused you to change, why you felt the need to and whether or not the change is temporary or permanent. When you have come to a resolute conclusion to the aforementioned answers, then go back to that person and explain openly and rationally as to why the change occurred and remind them that you want them a part of your life regardless.

If dogs can love unconditionally, so can people and once those who want you to revert back to who you once were understand and accept that you love them no matter what, they will then accept you for who you are. In addition, you will be surprised at how many more people may enter your life with your new change in attitude. Don’t throw in the towel until the fight has truly come to an end.

Your relationship ended, one of you moved out, you won’t talk to each other anymore, your world has unraveled and the thoughts wandering in your mind are endless. What should you do?

Moving on can be a lot of work. The never ending reminders creep up on us almost hourly so here are a few suggestions on what you can do to make the pain a little more bearable:

1. Call old friends: It may be a difficult step to take, especially if you haven’t kept in contact with certain friends throughout your relationship. However, give it a shot because in the end a true friend will understand and want to help.

2. Get out of the house: One of the worst things you can do is keep yourself holed up. Go shopping, take a walk, join that gym you wanted to join a while back. Just make sure you get out and socialize a bit. Contact with others, even those we don’t know, can go a long way in easing your emotional situation.

3. Restructure your time: Rather then watching the same tv shows or eating at the same time, restructure your time. If you can, watch your show on demand or catch a rerun. Take time out to read at your normal eating time. Just make sure not to do the same things you use to do at the same time you use to do them while you were with your partner. Take up volunteer work – that will definitely make the most use of your time and you will probably meet some great new people.

4. Talk it out: No more “hug it out” when things go wrong. Talk to those close to you about what has happened and how you feel. No one expects you to walk around like a wall of stone – if you did, people would probably be very worried. You are going through a traumatic situation and sometimes the best way to accept what has occurred is to talk about it.

5. Invest in something: Breakup’s can be devastating on the bank account. Rather then spending a thousand dollars shopping pick up the financial section of your newspaper, or hit the financial websites online, and see what investment you can make with that thousand.

6. Contact a therapist: If after everything you have done to try to get over your breakup doesn’t seem to work, contact a therapist. Talking to, and obtaining advice from, someone objective may be what you need to successfully move on.

Lastly, don’t worry. You are not alone in your breakup because your previous partner is going through the same thing. And where there is the two of you, there are dozens of other people going through a similar situation at the very same moment you are.

I have been involved with one aspect or another regarding customer service for most of my life.

It started out when I worked at a fast food place when I was 13 and I was a counter girl. Looking back, that was a pretty cool job. Then I moved into fashion, from there I wandered into banking and so on until now. Just because you own a company doesn’t mean that you can take a back seat and let someone else drive.

I am a very cordial person. I display common courtesy. I will give you all the necessary information I have available so that you can make an informed decision. And by the same token, I would expect the same. I would hope that if you’re on the receiving end of my irate call, you would not play games with me, lie to me or give me anymore of a headache then I already have – especially when I have been calling about the same issue for five months.

I won’t use profanity, I won’t yell, I won’t call you names as all of the aforementioned is useless in getting my point across. I will be firm, if I think you are jerking me around then I will call you on it and I will work with you to try and resolve my problem even though your company is not paying me to come up with a resolution.

So, why is it that if I can be an adult and understand both sides of the coin, people who call my establishment cannot conduct themselves in the same manner? Do you HONESTLY believe that I am going to want to help you when you are screaming at me, being confrontational or calling me the “C” word for no reason other then me telling you what you have to do in order to make a return? Rather then helping, I will simply hang up. I will not, under any circumstance, accept rudeness and hostility of any kind. Keep your anger in check.

Most people really do not realize that by being cordial and courteous a positive outcome can be obtained. Therefore, the next time you feel the need to be rude to anyone that may have the ability to help you, take a step back and reconsider. By being rude to the one person who may be able to help you, you run the risk of inciting anger in that person. Thereby, making any potential help in resolving your problem a moot possibility.

I was getting my hair done this weekend and like a bunch of birds on a perch, we were all yapping about relationships. Out of nowhere this very quiet, older woman said, “the key to a successful marriage is never having a meaningful conversation”. With that, we couldn’t stop laughing.

It got me thinking, how many relationships go by the wayside because people just don’t do what they used to? I’m not talking the amazing weekend getaways. I’m talking about the simple things such as saying you love that person or possibly switching the roles at home on who takes care of what over a weekend. I think if people took the time to acknowledge the person they are with, rather then being hell bent on ignoring them, then that relationship has a chance of making it.

I’m no expert but I do listen to what others say in passing. Therefore, here’s my list of how I think one can keep a relationship a success:

1. Remind yourself what it was that made you fall in love with the person you’re with now.

2. Take a moment to reflect on all the funny moments you have had so far; those moments that have made you laugh so hard you actually cried.

3. Sit and think how your life would be if this person wasn’t in it.

4. Remember all the arguments you have had and then remember how you got through them all.

5. When you have fallen (literally and figuratively) hasn’t your partner been there to pick you up?

6. When you have been sick, has your partner held your hair or slept on the floor next to you to make sure you were going to be ok?

7. Ask yourself, wouldn’t this person give up their life for me if I needed them to?

8. Tell the person you’re with that you love them once a day.

9. Make sure you hug and kiss each other once a day (make it a ritual).

10. If you’re the good cook and your partner is bad, then invite them into the kitchen to help you – maybe you’ll end up teaching them or maybe you’ll end up with whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles all over each other. Oh and don’t get pissy about the cleaning up afterwards.

11. Take time to communicate and by that I don’t mean yelling and screaming. Have a conversation even if it’s about a TV show. Communication is key to any successful relationship.

12. Realize that a relationship takes two people to make it WORK and those same two people can make it FAIL. Stop placing the blame and start realizing that neither of you are perfect; In order for your relationship to work the two of you have to work at it.

I hope that if you read this objectively, you and your partner will find a way to make your relationship one of the few that actually survives the test of time.

Just added to our product line, the Televibe will deliver pleasure to whoever you want, from where ever you are!

I totally understand why women, and men for that matter, are so anti adult novelty. That which we don’t understand frightens us hence; leading us down an unknowledgeable path. Recently, I have noticed more and more (predominantly women owned) ecommerce sites which sell adult novelties taking a more proactive approach in explaining what toys are good for beginner, intermediate and advance novelty buyers.

How is one supposed to be able to decide? There are a lot of novelties out there and we have seen a huge explosion and change in the market really catering to women over the last five years. And while that is absolutely great – it can also be absolutely confusing.

I was just as confused as most when I first picked out my toy and being that I was very embarrassed I knew I wanted something small. My first toy was the Compact Water Pro. Why? Well it was small and not at all intimidating. I liked the fact that it took one AA battery (as I constantly have those types of batteries in my drawers at home). I also thought it neat that it came with three cap attachments. And finally, I wasn’t really ready for anything that you had to insert. Those types of toys, at the time, scared me into day terrors.

I let a few years pass before I purchased my next toy. Thanks to the Sex in the City episode it seemed as if I had found what would be my new best friend. However, before I actually purchased the Jack Rabbit a friend had told me about this Impulse Jack Rabbit. The wonderful world of the internet gave me all the info I needed to know about what was just about to be my new friend - which had various speeds and vibrations – and soon enough this toy was added to my arsenal (yes it was only novelty number two but give me a chance here…..).

As time went on and I finally decided to sell novelties I figured that I actually had to know what it was that I was selling. In walks…….PRODUCT TESTER. Yep, that’s me!

Trust me when I tell you that some of these items that were coming to my desk absolutely frightened me. However, thanks to the wonderful world of the internet I was able to research and read reviews of items that actually interested me (and what I thought would interest others as well). One of the items I read about was for men, Senso Lips. I always thought it was weird that a guy would actually want to use a rubber item for masturbation but, after I read about it, and realized that a hand only works for so long (much like fingers for a woman), I decided to pick one up and give it to my boyfriend at the time. He absolutely LOVED it.

See, each person’s taste differs and that is great because there are so many items out there today to accommodate different folks with different strokes. Where some women may not be into something like the Ballsy Super Cock those same women may like something such as I Rub My Duckie which is very unassuming and very cute. Men are picky as well and they have a right to be. If a guy was going to ask my opinion about what to purchase for pleasure, I may very well recommend the Senso Lips and the Toys for Boys Collection. Why? Both have received great reviews, both are not imposing and I can speak from second hand experience about how well they work. And when it comes to what I would suggest for couples, the list is endless. Just a few items I would recommend would be the Cone, the Sensual Bath Kit, the Weekend Fun Collection (just the name itself would make me want to buy it) and so on – you don’t have all day to sit and read my list…..lol.

The bottom line is when choosing a toy, something you may have never used before and find a little frightening, choose something small to start and then you may want to graduate to something a bit more risqué afterwards. Research, read and don’t be afraid to ask questions. Also, if you start out with something small the cost of the item is usually less which means if you don’t find it pleasurable then you don’t feel as if you wasted money. I also find that using a small amount of lube is useful when you first start out as well. My personal favorite is K-Y warming or tingling lube. You only need a dab of it for it to work well. And lastly, if you purchase a silicone toy only use water based lubricants and wash your toy carefully with a mild soap and warm water.

Now get out there, get shopping and have some FUN!

I have added two images (one obviously with adult parts blocked) of a similar product.

Which packaging appeals to you more? How much does packaging influence your decision to purchase an adult toy? Would one of these packages offend you more or is it all irrelevant?

I checked my email the other day only to find a piece of mail in my inbox that said, “Make this New Year’s the Sweetest Celebration”. The email came from Clever Cookie – by the way, if you want the most outstanding tasting cookies on the plant I highly suggest getting them from there (or and Harry and David’s Red Velvet Cake…yum!).

I was a little taken back because we haven’t even approached Halloween – which I might add the stores were getting ready for back in July BUT they call it seasonal celebration. Seasonal my ass!

Every year we have these “seasons” and “holidays” pushed upon us earlier and earlier. Kids aren’t even back in school yet and we get to hear about the latest costumes available for Halloween. Oh and this year I am NOT answering my door and here’s the reason why. For some reason I am the talk of my neighborhood but yet the only people I have ever spoken to are my neighbors next door. I am single, successful, have not acquired what I have by getting divorced or through a death but rather by years and years of 18 to 20 hour days. Since I live in suburbia, and I really rather keep my life to myself, those I do not converse with seem to have come up with their own conclusions about me and you know what, that is fine. However, when word gets back to me that things being said are just downright nasty and inaccurate, and for years I have been spending money so that your kids can come ring my door, aggravate my dogs and grab candy out of my hands like it’s their last meal, well I have two words for you and they aren’t get lost!!!!

Sorry, I’m got off track. To read an email about New Years when Thanksgiving hadn’t even passed, and I am hoping that we can rewind back to May, really put me off. I am in the retail business as well and because I don’t like holidays crammed down my throat until it is needed, I won’t do it to my customers. I truly believe you only need 30 days prior to the holiday to get your point out but each year we are forced to acknowledge that a holiday is fast approaching and before you know it, we will be hearing about Christmas sales in July.

With that being said, are you getting ready for the holidays?

I remember long ago I was actually driving into NYC from NJ one morning on my way to work and as it would have it there was traffic going through the toll near the Liberty Science Center.

So there I was, sitting in traffic and just looking around because I was so bored when something caught my attention in the car to the right and slightly in front of me. That thing that caught my attention was a rather floppy type dildo and the girl who was hastily trying to put it away. The thoughts that ran through my, and probably everyone else who saw her, mind still kinda amaze me today.

As you can tell, I still think about that morning from time to time which leads me to my next review.

We have all done the naughty in one way or another while driving. As long as safety on the road comes first (no pun intended….lol) then I am all for whatever stress relieving action one needs to take. However, if you’re like me then you like to be a tad more discreet than Ms. Floppy Dildo Girl and I have a product review for you – the Vibrating Lipstick.

This tiny vibrator – sans Lipstick – is absolutely what any woman, who is looking for a discreet quickie, needs in her pocketbook. Might I add that the vibration on this toy is perfect for its size. The constant vibration (which is adjustable) does the trick and will put a surprising smile on your face. Once you’re done you simply twist the vibrator (much like your own lipstick) back into place, put the cap on it and put it in your bag (well I suggest washing it first if you can find a bathroom). Voila! You will have made your day, and smile, that much brighter.

Ever have one of those odd weekends that leave you kinda perplexed come the work day?

I left work early on Friday to try and beat the traffic and it still took me 2 hours to get home. It’s a good thing that I have such an appreciation for music because I was bee-bopping just about the entire way home. People on the parkway must have felt bad for me because I really looked like I was convulsing or something.

I get home and realize that I am going out later that night however, everyone is either still at work or stuck in traffic. Now I’m bored and if I take a shower at that point, it would be too early and I would most likely fall asleep afterwards and that would be that. So what do I do? I make the dreaded mistake of opening the bottle of wine that has been sitting in my refrigerator for the last three days.

Fill up – glass one. Make a few phone calls. Fill up – glass two. We aren’t talking small glasses either. Proceed to take a shower and do my hair. Fill up – glass three. I’m feeling a little buzzed at this point because I haven’t eaten all day. Lets just say that by the time I was done it was around 10pm and I was wiped. No going out for me!

Onto Saturday where I throw a toy party; by other people’s standards the party would have been considered a success. By my standard it was a failure even though I made money.

Anyway, I am talking to two of my friends when we started talking about the most bizarre things. It could have been the three Grey Goose and Cran’s I had or could have been the multiple Bacardi Gold and Coke’s they had – the jury is still out on that one! I’m still out on my deck, having a conversation about god knows what because the convo is going in several different directions when I start to feel nauseous. Thank you vile mini corn dogs. Although everyone else felt fine after eating them, my tummy just did not like them. So again, off to bed by 10pm!

Moving to Sunday – the strangest of all days. The earlier part of the day was fine. I utilized my deck and got some sun before heading over to a friends BBQ where I was completely out of place (as was my date). To make matters even a bit more uncomfortable there was a guy at the BBQ that I went to dinner with about three weeks ago, but did not hit it off with him, who was just giving me nasty looks. Hey I’m sorry that you’re 30 and act like you’re 12. If I wanted to date a child I would just get back together with my ex. And I’m sorry that I don’t find it even close to amusing that you drive with an open container, with your kid in the car, even after you were charged with a DUI. Sorry I’m not so juvenile. You’ll find someone who is – that I am sure of!

The hosts of the BBQ ended up arguing, I meet a really cute, nice guy who is unemployed (no thanks – I have to move on), a friend of mine is talking about having sex with a guy she just met. Hello, what the hell happen to the 3 month rule? You don’t even know if you like this guy! Everyone is nice in the beginning – take it slow!!!!!!!

Long story short, come Monday I was completely wiped out from the events of the weekend and I am so looking forward to my vacation starting Wednesday afternoon. It will just be me, my dogs and some sun. Between the drinking and eating, I need a vacation from the mini vacation I just had!

It is a given that we are different from any other species on the planet.  What makes us different?  Simply put our ability to be innovative, progressive and compassionate. 

 

We are compassionate on so many different levels – when a co worker is having a really bad day and has to finish a project that has a deadline of yesterday, we feel bad for them and in some instances offer our help to them.  When a friend has a relative who has just passed we console them and try to do everything within our power to make them feel better.  The list is endless and I am sure you see my point.

 

However, more in line with my curiosity is why we feel the need to give those that hurt us on such levels a second chance.  You know we have all done it – the “ok, I’ll give you one more chance and if you screw up this time then (enter graphic detail of getting even here) _______________”.  And I know that some of you have even gone as far as to give a third, forth, fifth………you get the point.  Even if the words “second chance” is never spoken, we have given that chance to children, co workers, lovers and hell, even our pets.

 

In some cases giving someone another chance does work out.  This does not mean that mistakes won’t be made again but more than likely the SAME mistake won’t be made if a true effort has been put forth.  Don’t get me wrong, all too often I have heard, read and experienced the mistake in giving a second chance but as I get older I firmly believe in the “twice” rule.

 

I believe that everyone should try, at his or her discretion, everything twice and that includes (but not always – use your best judgment as I am recently going through a “not giving a second chance” situation) giving a relationship of various degrees a second chance.  If you never take that step, you may be missing out on something great somewhere down the line, and if it turns out that giving a second chance was a mistake then at least you know you did what you could to try and salvage something that was unsalvageable.

As I have stated in the contents of my profile on this blog I am here to do toy reviews – as well as ramble aimlessly about my life and anything else that comes to mind.

 

*Note:  if at any time I bore you to death or confuse you beyond belief feel free to just put tape over my mouth, or in this case, feel free to take away my keyboard!

 

Anyway, this toy review is the male masturbator Senso Lips.  This toy is for men and since I do a lot of talking relating to women, I thought it only fair to start out a review pertaining to male pleasure.

 

Now when one looks at this product they automatically think why, or how, or what?  However, I happen to know first hand that this toy actually delivers what its intended purpose is for.  Ok, well maybe I don’t know FIRST hand being a girl and all BUT I do know second hand.  I had read reviews about this item in Maxim Magazine a couple of years back.  Just starting out in the business, I was a little leery of adding this product to my inventory so I purchased this for my boyfriend at the time.

 

He LOVED it.  He told me how soft it felt, how a little lube went a long way, how it stretched appropriately and how close to the real thing it actually was.  In addition, with mild soap and water, he was able to easily clean it.

 

So if you are looking for something to use when you’re single or your partner isn’t available, I recommend a toy like Senso Lips.  It can never replace the real thing but it sure can come close.

Sunday I was invited to a bbq at my hair dressers house.  She has a pool and I DON’T own a bathing suit.  I will elaborate more on that later.

Anyway, the bbq started promptly at 1:30 and I was nervous.  I’m not a social person and I feel really out of my element especially when I am on someone else’s turf (if you know what I mean).  Before I left the house, I considered calling her and coming up with some lame excuse as to why I couldn’t make it.  In the end though, I buckled up, headed to the store to buy things to bring to this gathering (never visit someone’s house empty handed) and was on my way.

Once I arrived I realized that I knew most of the people there so I ended up being more comfortable then I thought I would.  We all sat around and gabbed and drank, ad drank some more, and gabbed some more (her poor fiancé must have been out of his mind from boredom with all of us women chatting about like a bunch of yenta’s).

Now to back up a bit, Saturday I had gotten my hair done.  If you had read my prior post then you would understand why (post:  How to cleanse….).  While I was there I had explained to my hair dresser what had happened and how relieved I felt.  I really felt FREE.  And then I went onto discuss that I would really just like to find someone who “fits” and “gets me” – someone who is busy, grounded, responsible, appreciative, intelligent, fun, humorous and not looking to get married or live off my coat tails.  And wouldn’t you know it, they (meaning all of them at the shop) had someone.

 

I’m 38 and recently out of a relationship with someone 10 years younger.  The last thing I want to do is hook up with someone younger again.  Granted this person is at least in the same age decade as me and can vividly remember leg warmers and 8 track tapes but after what I just went through wouldn’t you think I’d be out of my mind to take a step in that direction………again?  Ok all you moaners, yes I know “age is just a number” and I heard the same phrase from the last one.  So, after some thought (and maybe 3 or 4 too many glasses of wine) I figured I would try to get past the age thing…..again.

It was a spur of the moment thing when this person showed up to the bbq and I was a bit surprised since I was actually supposed to meet him on Labor Day.  He was tall, kinda cute, very friendly,  very boisterous (I’m kinda quiet), definitely intuitive, stable, makes a decent living, etc….  One of the first things he asked me is if I wanted to go to Vegas as I stated I had never been during a conversation.  I was like, “hello you don’t know me and I can’t afford Vegas”.  Of course the next words were, “you don’t have to pay for anything”.  Uh yeah right – I may not have to fork out cash but I know what you’re thinking buddy.

After the Vegas talk we then talked about bungee jumping (I’d like to get over my fear of heights before I die) in PA.  At first I was all for it and then these weird thoughts started going through my head such as, “what if he booked a room at one of those cheesy hotels in the Pocono’s?  What if I ended up in some back woods type area like the movie Wrong Turn?  What he cut the cord right after I jumped?” – as you can tell, I am not trusting and I may be a bit crazy to some of you BUT I am ALWAYS cautious.  Long story short I realized that I was giving this guy a really hard time.  My motto has always been a person is nice until you get to know them.  Come 7:30 it was time for me to leave.  The wine bottle was finally empty and my gracious host opened another one – definitely a clue that it was time to go home – but I had to get to bed so I could make it to work.  I gave the guy my cell number (after all I can always change it – unless of course he runs my plates on my car through a friend at DMV as the last insane guy I met said he could do if he wanted to find out where I lived – yes he was very creepy) and he asked if could take me to dinner sometime.  I said sure, I’d like that, gave a handshake and a kiss on the cheek goodbye, and I promptly drove home.

 
The odd thing is, is that I’m not sure now if I want to actually “date”.  I loathe labels and would much rather keep it friendly and fun.  Who knows how I’ll feel in a month or two but right now I am not looking for the “seeing”, “dating” or “committed” labeling system.

Oh well, just another off centered tennis match going on in my head.  I wish one side would win already so I can figure out what I want.

Now isn't this just adorable!  Have fun in the tub again like when you were younger.

I was reading an article on Yahoo that gave five tips on how to make your partner jealous. These tips were invasive but something about it just angered me.

I’m going to go on record here and say that since the inception of the internet (for personal use) there has been an increase in deception by both males and females. I remember years ago I lied to a friend and it hurt him so bad that I swore that I would never lie or be deceitful ever again and I haven’t. In every relationship I have had I have always been honest – sometimes too honest (maybe that’s why I’m still single perhaps). My motto is, “you can hate the truth but never hate me for being honest”. That is something I live by and expect others in my life to live by as well.

Anyway, after reading these really stupid, harmless tips I started wondering – whatever happen to COMMUNICATING? I’m not talking the nit picking, nagging type communication but the type where you tell someone how you feel and let them know that what you feel is important to you. All too often I have heard from a partner that what I feel seems petty and to let it go. If I thought my feelings, which I am conveying to you, were petty then I would never waste the precious time we have bringing up how something may bother me. You bet your ass it’s important and I don’t appreciate you making it out to seem anything other than.

Why would I want to purposely make my partner jealous? Hell, I’m the one who will pick out the hottest girl I can find and nudge who I’m with to look at her. I’m not so insecure to think a look will lead to marriage. Sure I will dress up nicely but that is more for the person I am with (do you really think it’s comfortable to sit at a bar in heels and a skirt so short you’re afraid people can see the stitching in the panties you’re wearing?), and although he may get a little jealous from the types of glances I receive, he is made very well aware that I did not wear what I did to make him jealous but more to make him want to ravage me. Again, what did I do there? I communicated my thoughts and feelings to him AFTER he communicated his thoughts and feelings to me.

All of those tips were insulting and the writer should have his/her pen, keyboard, type writer all taken away. Making someone jealous isn’t the answer to helping a relationship. If you want to challenge each other in the name of good fun or to help better that person for him/herself then I say go for it. If you find the need to make your partner jealous, rather then communicating, then you need to end the relationship for it is truly doomed.

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Tags: cassies advice

1. turn off their cell phone and delete the number (for it won't work anymore)
2. know that they will call you from their new number (as to say hey don't forget about me)
3. do not save new number and expect a text message
4. text message comes in later that night even thought that person says they were going to bed as soon as they got home
5. respond to text message with no more than 3 letters the following morning and do it early so that you interrupt that persons sleep
6. delete entire call history and text message history thereby wiping out that persons number from your phone completely (remember you didn't save it)
7. delete their email address from your outlook, msn, yahoo, etc...and delete from your myspace page
8. go home tonight and rip up all pictures
9. set up dating profile so you have something to do on the "bored" nights


and that is how you rid (cleanse) someone from your life!

now back to your regularly scheduled program :-)